It is a common opinion that the BDSM submission and empowerment are mutually exclusive and can’t even exist in the same sentence, mostly due to some misconceptions regarding the BDSM subculture in general. Strong and independent females who have submissive tendencies, on the other hand, are particularly hard to reconcile their BDSM and everyday lives since they are facing this pressure that feminists can only be dominatrices and nothing else. Guys are quite safe though!

Further, an idea of submissive woman usually wakes up the disgust in vanilla feminists who believe that sexual liberation would be – for those who are into it, of course – best embodied in a femdom relationship. Speaking of which, dominant BBW singles are pretty sought after within the BDSM circles which means that this culture celebrates all women regardless of their shape and size by letting them express their inner sexual power.

But what about masochists, some might ask? Well, the BDSM is pretty rewarding to all of its practitioners, regardless of their affinities, by allowing one to overcome various mental obstacles and societal pedantry that were preventing him/her from enjoying their wildest fantasies. In the end, the truth is that you can actually become empowered through BDSM and we’re here to show you how.

Submission means more Control

No matter how paradoxical it may appear at the first sight, being submissive actually puts one in control of everything that is happening during the BDSM session. A sub can always use some of the pre-arranged safe words in order to prolong the certain tortures or sexual plays, give dom a hint if they are reaching the tolerance threshold or even make them stop whatever is they are doing. This means that a master actually has a pretty complex task that consists of being able to dominate their sub properly so that they can both derive pleasure from a BDSM session. This means that they are completely equal participants in the act, which is pretty empowering, at least the way we see it.

Submission means embracing yourself

It seems that people are finding it more difficult to accept their sub nature, or are less willing to talk about it once they come to terms with it, mostly because it’s somehow branded as less worthy or isn’t exactly in accordance with a person’s own principles that has guided them for the most of their life. What’s in particular liberating about acknowledging you’re a sub is that you’re actually admitting that you enjoy receiving torture and that you’re ready to submit yourself only to someone who truly deserves it. You know that this couldn’t happen with someone you’re not really compatible with, but that you need a master/mistress who will know to hit the right nerve, positively speaking, and offer you a domination that he/she is sure will work for you and you only.

Submission means active participation

Being a sub is not about being a passive observer of the BDSM scene because you get to actively participate in it. The sexual game is completely consensual and is usually played according to a certain scenario that allows you to fulfill all your wildest submission fantasies to the extent you and your dom/dominatrix believe is enjoyable for both sides. No one is getting the less treatment, regardless of their role, which isn’t something we could honestly claim when it comes to vanilla sex.

And is there a better way to feel empowered than to consciously do whatever your heart desires? Think about it.