A contract in this context is an agreement which formally sets out the roles, responsibilities and limits of a Dominant/submissive or Master/slave relationship. Some find them useful because they demand thought about what each person is prepared to contribute to the relationship and what they expect out of it. This may provide a sense of clarity as well as security. It may also create a sense of commitment and help to avoid potential points of conflict later on.
Others feel that contracts are worthless and in fact inhibit the natural change and growth of a healthy D/s relationship. There is some more information about contracts in our own ‘illustrated guide to bdsm’. In addition, we’ve collected some other links on this page to examples of slave contracts and also to pre-play checklists and play etiquette.
Why Write a Contract?
According to The Safe Submissive,
When people hear the terms “BDSM,” “Dominant,” “submissive,” and the likes, they interpret them differently. If you and your partner decide that this is something you want to pursue but don’t know where to start, coming up with a contract, going over it together, and revising it can be an excellent way to open the lines of communication. It can be as simple as a paragraph, or as complex as a multi-page document. Personally, I’m a fan of being thorough.
Writing and signing a contract can also help with the power exchange in general. Instead of saying “Yeah, lets try this” and then fumbling your way through it, a contract helps you to say “This is when we are starting, and this is what we are trying to accomplish.” It also helps you to get more into the “role” because it makes it seem more official.
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