As we all know, there is more than one sexual preference out there and even more ways to fulfill your erotic fantasies. From good, old heterosexual intercourse, over transgender and BBW dating, all the way to fetishes and cross-dressing. But have you ever wondered “what actually is BDSM?” We’ve all heard of it, some of us have tried it, but not many of us got the chance to uncover the real meaning of bondage.
At first sight, it might seem as rather strange and deviant behavior, with all those chains and ropes and whatnot. However, once you really get into the matter, you’ll find that everything can be explained and that BDSM is no exception to that.
The Straightforward Explanation
Before we get to BDSM questions and answers, it would probably be best to first take a quick look at the acronym itself in order to answer the question “what does BDSM mean.” There is more than one way to read the letters, but the most widely accepted one goes as follows: BD stands for bondage and discipline, DS represents domination and submission, while SM stands from sadism and masochism (or sadomasochism for short).
Now, let’s analyze each and every word we can find in the acronym. Bondage, obviously, is the sexual act that involves ropes, chains and latex garment in such a way that it makes one partner immobile, all in the goal of increased sexual pleasure.
Discipline, domination and submission are very closely related and pretty self-explanatory. These acts revolve around belittling, general role play and one partner punishing the other with insults. The choice you will make depends on your and your partner’s preference. Laura from www.SchoolofSquirt.com has some great BDSM ideas.”
Finally, we’re getting to sadism and masochism. The SM part of BDSM refers to the physical punishment of your partner or yourself. The point is to do this in a way that will cause immediate pain, but also that will avoid causing any permanent or serious damage.
Details and Red Flags
Now that you’re acquainted with the crude outlines of BDSM, your next step is learning a few crucial details without which BDSM wouldn’t be possible.
It should be pretty clear by now that not all of us are cut out for BDSM. Those faint of heart and those who are unable to enjoy pain on any level, won’t find any satisfaction in sadomasochism and bondage. On the other hand, the first lesson of BDSM for beginners should be about the safe word.
The safe word works in a very simple way – before you engage in BDSM roleplaying with your partner, sit down with them and come up with a word or phrase that you wouldn’t hear every day. Once you’ve established the safe word, both of you should be good to go. If either of you says the safe word, you should stop everything you are doing and make sure that no one’s hurt. BDSM can be fun and exciting if done right.
Coleen is a writer, photographer and film maker at Wasteland and Sssh.com.
Here at BDSMCafe.com, she is editor and curator of this comprehensive library of BDSM fiction, informational articles and other educational features that date back to the early days of the internet in 1996 when the site was first launched.
